MODULE 2B
Strengthening Marital Relationships
I would love to dwell more on marital relationships here. In my counselling work on stress and stress-related challenges, relationship problems consistently top the list of causes of stress. Today, many families face unhappy relationships, separation, and divorce.
I am one of the fortunate women who married a good and committed man. Through counselling, I realised that marriage is a demanding journey. For it to succeed, the couple—especially the woman—must be willing to make the marriage work regardless of the difficulties that arise.
In every relationship, one partner is often stronger. During difficult seasons, the stronger partner must help restore balance so the marriage can thrive.
When both partners are spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and physically weak, support becomes scarce. Small issues can escalate into major conflicts because neither partner has the capacity to give what they do not possess.
How one reacts to marital challenges largely depends on perception. A spiritually weak and emotionally unstable individual may respond negatively, further damaging the relationship instead of seeking solutions.
Many marriages that failed had reasons for the breakdown. However, a shift in perspective could have resolved what seemed insurmountable. A spiritually and emotionally empowered man will not destroy his home because of extra-marital relationships.
Such a man understands that nothing should come between him and his family. Otherwise, despite fleeting pleasures, he remains unhappy and unfulfilled.
Happiness begins with mindset transformation, emotional empowerment, and prayer. Appreciating the gift of one’s wife and children is key to true fulfilment.
I invest in self-care, joy, and personal growth. This creates a positive ripple effect, strengthening the relationship as happiness becomes contagious.
From the book Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus by John Gray, we learn that men and women derive fulfilment differently. Men often feel fulfilled through achievement, while women thrive when their emotional needs are met.
Women desire affection, tenderness, and emotional intimacy. Material gifts alone cannot replace emotional and sexual fulfilment. Many women suffer silently when these needs are unmet.
Responses to these challenges vary—some complain, some pray patiently, some emotionally withdraw, and others seek external validation. Extra-marital relationships may bring temporary relief but often lead to lasting damage.
The truth remains: every challenge passes. Happiness can be found beyond sex—through books, learning, recreation, business growth, children, and friendships.
Men must remember that women have emotions too. Some men become affectionate only when they desire sex, which is selfish and damaging. Genuine love requires care, respect, and consistent effort.
Infertility has broken many marriages, yet where love, friendship, understanding, and God exist, this challenge should not destroy a home. Adoption and surrogacy remain valid options when couples work together.
Finances are another major source of marital conflict. Financial transparency and joint management foster trust. A wife should be her husband’s confidant, and families should plan together for the future.
Some women out-earn their husbands, while some men fail in responsibility. Regardless, humility, patience, and mutual respect must guide financial decisions.
A woman should support her husband despite his struggles, remembering that today’s limitation may become tomorrow’s breakthrough. Likewise, work should never replace one’s primary role as wife and mother.
While some men may be irresponsible or emotionally unavailable, I still encourage women to persevere, pray, and take practical steps. Faith without action produces no results.
However, some relationships may be irreparably broken. In such cases, separation may protect health and well-being. Parents should remain respectful and avoid poisoning their children’s minds.
Children should encourage reconciliation, pray for their parents, and advocate for peace and unity. Their words and prayers carry immense influence.
I appeal to men to remember their vow to protect and cherish their wives. As heads of families, they must lead responsibly and guard their homes against destructive influences.
Every man should reflect on the legacy he intends to leave—his values, character, and example to his children.
I pray that God heals broken hearts and marriages, granting forgiveness, love, tolerance, and joyful reunions. May He bless you with phenomenal relationships and marriages.
Sending all my love and prayers to you.